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Hate Mail
by Bob Osgoodby
If you hang around the web long enough, you will probably get a
nasty, expletive filled note about something. Normally sent by
someone who happens to be in a foul mood at the time, pay
attention, but don't respond in kind. You might simply be in the
wrong place at the right time, and you're their target of
opportunity. Anyone in business on the web has experienced this.
Who knows what set them off?
Maybe they had a bad day at work, or a fight with their spouse.
Maybe someone cut them off on their way home, or they received
30 of the same spam messages in their mail box.
Now here is the intriguing part. Anyone who uses one or more of
George Carlin's "seven dirty words" most likely wouldn't in a
"face to face" meeting. If you have never heard of the comedian
George Carlin, think of seven of the dirtiest words you can think
of, and you will get the point.
Now, if you receive an email like this, there are two things you
must do.
First, try to figure out why they sent it. It is normally a
response to something you have done or said. Did you spam a
newsgroup or an "unmoderated" email list? If so, you probably
deserve a "reprimand", but if someone is simply disagreeing with
you, try to figure out why. Most of the people on the web are
passive in nature, and won't take the time to respond. But you
can be sure that if someone does, you have probably "rung the
bell" of many others, who simply won't expend the energy to let
you know.
Second - never respond in kind. No matter how offended you are,
or how tempted you are to respond back, you are making a huge
mistake in doing so. Face it. Someone who does this is either
ignorant, or unbalanced, and you really don't want to get
involved with either. You will simply fuel their fire. Most,
who do something like this, calm down after they send their
missive, and usually that will be the end of it. But, if you
respond back, even if it is in a nice way, you may become their
"holy grail".
So what do you do? If you could be at fault, simply ignore it.
I know this may be hard to swallow, but if you are in business,
it is your best course of action. While you may get momentary
satisfaction by responding in the same way, it is normally a big
mistake.
If the threat goes beyond simple harassment, report it to the
local authorities. In the event that the note contains defamatory
statements, there are agencies on the State and Federal level who
can help. If you feel threatened by the content of the email,
also forward it to their Internet Service Provider (ISP) at their
"abuse" email address. Most ISP's will summarily cancel an
account that uses language of a threatening nature in an email.
If the threat is of a serious nature, they may call in the
authorities. While you may not win the battle in this case, you
will win the war.
The Internet is very impersonal, and that is a double edged
sword. You do have the anonymity provided, so unless you are
running a high profile web site, or are active in other ways,
people really don't know who you are. While you do enjoy the
privacy this offers, it also allows the abuse of this privacy.
The web is really a cross section of people all over the world.
You have the highly moral who wouldn't dream of writing an
abusive email. At the bottom of the spectrum there are some,
who if they weren't low class, wouldn't have any class at all.
As in real life, there are people you like, and some that you
don't. If someone has no manners in their day-to-day life, what
makes you think they will on the web? While you can avoid them
in real life, you can't on the web as their email can slip
through to aggravate you. If it is simply annoying, filter it
into your Trash Basket so you never even see it.
While you may be tempted to respond back, the best way to deal
with "hate mail" is to simply ignore it. If it persists, then
exercise some of your other options.
Bob publishes the free weekly "Your Business" Newsletter
Visit his Web Site at http://www.adv-marketing.com/business to subscribe.
As a bonus, get 40,000 FREE E-Books from
Larry Dotson, when you visit http://www.ldpublishing.com
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